Change

Very few things in life are certain, but we can be certain of change.

The only thing that is constant is change.

Everything changes, nothing stays the same.

We can’t escape it, change is all around us and always present. No matter what stage of life you may be at, you will experience some sort of change. I’m sure if I had to ask you what sort of change you are experiencing right now, you would be able to give me at least one example of change – whether it be a change in job, a new relationship, the end of an old relationship, moving to a new city, a new boss or maybe the loss of a loved one. Change is always present.

I find it very interesting how we react to change. It is often met with negative emotions or new happiness – both of which I believe inappropriate.

Inappropriate? Well, this is why I think so:

Often change will signal the end of something - the end of an era or a chapter. With this end often comes a longing for the good old days, a desire for things to be how they used to be. As a result, we never fully embrace the change or the new chapter, but we resist and compare – which in turn leads us to be discontent.

We so often let the past rob us of the present.

Other times we may be extremely excited about change. This is often when the change signals the end of time of discontentment. Maybe a boss who has made your life miserable is moving on, or maybe you are leaving a job you hate for a new one. Maybe you are moving with the hope of greener pastures. But as we experience the new pastures we often find that it is not what we had dreamed it would be, and we in turn hope that the next change will bring us happiness. Hoping for change to bring us happiness is inappropriate because it never will.

We so often let our hope for the future rob us of the present.

Even though we will always experience change, the present is all we have. Change can cause you to look longingly back into how things were or expectantly into what is coming, but what I believe we should do when change comes along is to look purposefully into the present. What can I embrace right now that honours and remembers the past but will set me up to maximise on what is coming.

If we can move to this, we will move from reacting to change to responding with purpose.
__________
Don Muller has spent the last 4 years working into corporate and church leadership development and training both locally and internationally. He has a passion for and works towards seeing individuals live out their strengths and calling daily.

Upgrading the Other Way

Last week I sent out a BBM broadcast to my loyal Blackberry friends notifying them I would be leaving the community. It was time for an upgrade and Blackberry was not part of my next move! 90% of the responses assumed I now had an Iphone. Either they would be joining me soon or expressed their satisfaction in my choice.

But I am not getting an IPHONE... or any other smart phone for that matter.

But is that a smart move?

I recently wrote a blog on my experience of spending a few days without my Blackberry after it had crashed. It was a liberating experience where I enjoyed a slower pace and more space. I realised in that short amount of time that turning my phone on was almost the same as turning on the world. In an instant I was connected to clients, friends, news, information, tweets...

As much as I love everything about technology it had invaded my world and had the potential to rob me of being present and enjoying what I love the most. I had to think about what really counted and then make a decision about how to make it count!

So I got a plain and simple Nokia C5.

So far the response has been interesting. Some have given me a few months before I get over it! Some have told me its embarrassing! Even the Vodacom salesmen couldn’t believe it! Now when everyone puts their phones down on the table, mine will rest alongside its bigger more sophisticated brothers!

An eye opener had been how often I reach for my new phone and search for something to do on it - a habitual pattern! With no attractive offerings the phone seems to slowly only find my hands to make a call or read a text.

So why did I do it?

To make a statement - No.

To try and get everyone else to do the same - No.

The answer is simple. I know myself. I know what is most NB to me. And I know what I need to do in order to put myself squarely in the middle of what is most NB to me.

If it means letting go of ‘stuff’ that I enjoy then so be it.

As long as I do what I need to do to remain focussed on what really counts.

So thats my challenge (and it may not involve your phone!)

What clutter can you strip away in order to remain present & focussed on what really counts on a daily basis?

__________
Travis Gale has spent the last 5 years running his own development business in South Africa’s corporate world and is currently involved in various long term partnerships with clients across a number of industries. Furthermore he has travelled to conferences internationally hunting down latest trends and insights. Having cycled around the world and survived a tsunami, his passion for crossing borders often lends itself to an interesting blend of stories and insight. He sees himself as a ‘change catalyst’ and displays strength in facilitating insight into the right spaces. Find out more at www.appletreelive.com

The Power of Community

"It is in the shelter of each other that the people live."

This is the Irish proverb that inspired a song by a band called Jars Of Clay. The song is called the Shelter, and the lyrics have been the catalyst for me to consider the importance of community. Jars Of Clay sing:

"For those who've yet to find it
 The place is near where love is moving 
Cast off the robes you're wearing
 Set aside the names that you've been given
 May this place of rest in the fold of your journey
 Bind you to hope 
You will never walk alone 

In the shelter of each other 
We will live
 We will live (Never walk alone)

If there is any peace 
If there is any war 
We must all believe 
Our lives are not our own 
We all belong

God has given us each other
And we will never walk alone 

In the shelter of each other
 We will live."

This is powerful truth. Our lives are not our own. We were not created to do life alone, we exist and thrive in community. In his book Outliers, Malcolm Gladwell tells about the power of community present in a small Italian immigrant town called Roseto in Pennsylvania, USA. It was noted that in Roseto, people died only from old age, there was no illness or medical conditions that was claiming lives. As this phenomenon was investigated, it was discovered that their culture was the reason – a culture of community living in community. It was an amazing discovery – the power of their community brought them health.

Without community we cant thrive. Even Hollywood knows this truth. If you have watched the blockbuster Castaway, you would have witnessed Tom Hanks slowly slip into insanity (with his friend Wilson – the volleyball) as he was isolated on a deserted island. Law enforcement also understands this truth. One of the harshest forms of punishment is solitary confinement. Isolate a man and you will destroy him.

Community causes us to thrive but isolation causes us to die.

I then began to consider the corporate world. Corporates aim to thrive, but how much community is present in the work place? Is this a place of thriving community where people use their skills and ability to impact those around them, or a place of isolation and selfish ambition? The word corporate speaks about a group of people working together, yet the truth is so often little or no community exists in any team or corporate.

As leaders, we set the tone and create the environment for community to exist. Would you say the people that you lead feel like they are living in the shelter of the others in their team?

We were created for community. I encourage you to use the gifts that you have been given to benefit others, to create the “shelter” that will cause your team to thrive!

Trading Metaphors

Recently I arrived at a coffee shop to meet with Mark van Straaten. As the lead elder at Grace family Church in Umhlanga, KZN, Mark is one of my primary influencers. I believe in the idea of having primary influencers who impact on how we live our lives.

Choose wisely but avoid not choosing at all.

Primary influencers should be people you respect. They would have characteristics you aspire toward. They will have done something significant with their lives. They have gone before you and dealt with so much of what still lies ahead of you.

A half hour conversation could, more often than not, be more relevant and applicable than whatever it is you learnt at University!

As it was on this particular day.

I arrived at a coffee shop bringing with me a mind spinning with scenarios I was facing. The challenges within those scenarios kept me in a state of tension, negatively affecting my perspective.

Soon into our meeting Mark began to reflect on the idea of trading. Through some experience and some conversations he had had, he began to explain about this tension that exists in a traders life which simply never goes away.

“That tension” he explained, “is brought on due to the fact that traders can simply NEVER take into account all of the probabilities. It’s simply impossible!”

“The 5% of traders who make a success of trading” he continued, “recognise that trading is in fact a psychological process. The great traders are the ones who do it without FEAR. They simply know that they have to and will handle whatever happens next. They act from a place of complete confidence despite the risks associated with the unknown.”

As he spoke he held up a mirror. The probabilities I lived by were causing fear and anxiety.

“Fear limits our creativity” Mark continued seemingly knowing what I was thinking, “keeps us thinking ‘in the box’ which robs us of what we most need when we face the unknown - a mind open and focussed on possibility.”

Then the clincher.

“It’s not about abandoning reason. It’s about making a decision and sticking to it!”

In a few sentences I had let go of my need to control and began to look my context through the eyes of a ‘trader’. Changing my perspective through this critical insight yielded a different experience of my challenges. The weight disappeared.

The lesson is not only in the metaphor but in who that metaphor came from.

Who shares and impacts your story?

__________
Travis Gale has spent the last 5 years running his own development business in South Africa’s corporate world and is currently involved in various long term partnerships with clients across a number of industries. Furthermore he has travelled to conferences internationally hunting down latest trends and insights. Having cycled around the world and survived a tsunami, his passion for crossing borders often lends itself to an interesting blend of stories and insight. He sees himself as a ‘change catalyst’ and displays strength in facilitating insight into the right spaces. Find out more at www.appletreelive.com

The Unnamed Roads

My wife and I recently were in the Transkei, working our way along the amazing wild coast, visiting the numerous beautiful beaches. If you have ever visited the wild coast, you will know that, due to the rugged terrain, you may have to backtrack along main roads just to reach a destination a few kilometers along the coast.

We, however, had our faithful 4X4 (which has been affectionately dubbed "Butch"), and decided that instead of staying on many kilometers of main roads just to move a few kilometers up the coast, we would put Butch to the test and try make our way along pot hole filled dirt roads, cattle and foot paths to cut down the distance we needed to travel. Having never travelled the Transkei before, I was very tempted to opt for the safer bet of following the main roads, but adventure was calling so we started our mission along the unknown roads.

What followed was a journey through colourful and rural countryside with animal dodging and the locals waving madly. We had to mission down mountain passes, navigate new paths after coming across unexpected river crossings and watch the petrol gauge to ensure we did not run out of fuel in the middle of no where! I must admit at times we were pretty stressed and wished we had stayed on the main road, but overall we had an incredible adventure!

The whole experience made me aware that we often do the same in life.

We often will choose to be safe, stick to what we know (which is often discontentment), rather than move into the unknown.

Most people choose unhappiness over uncertainty.

And it is easy to understand why. Our place of discontentment is safe, secure and familiar. We know what to expect, we know what is expected of us. We know we will get the pay check, we know we will survive. But who wants to live in a place of discontentment their whole lives? We want our stories to be meaningful.

What are some of the unnamed roads that you long to explore? Where are some of the destinations you desire to discover? How would you like your life story to read?

The choice is ours. Do we choose to succumb to the fear of the unknown, or are we going to embrace the adventure of the unknown?

The choice is yours... The choice is mine... Let's live an adventure!